Easily amused

I have this new routine which would appear to most people to be rather mundane, and not at all amusing, but I have taken to watching late night talk shows. You know, Letterman, Leno, Conan…I never watched them before because I automatically assumed they were not funny, but I gotta tell ya- I get into bed at night and giggle my ass of for a good hour each night. I don’t actually think anything Jay Leno says is funny, but what I do LOVE are the headlines on Monday nights! I have the most elementary sense of humor, and I love it when someone forgets an “L” and publishes the word “pubic” unintentionally, with regard to something that was meant to be “public”. It gets me every time.

I think David Letterman is actually funny though. He has a knack for asking silly questions and establishing a humorous rapport with his guests. Last night for example, he had David Duchovny on the show, and he was talking about his 5-year-old son, and the funny things the kid said recently. Duchovny told Letterman that his child expressed his desire to be a “Chinese guy” when he grew up, and upon being told that he was not Chinese, but rather, had some Russian in him, the kid responded “I hate that guy!”. Ok, that’s funny enough- kids are innocently hilarious without even trying and that is rich in and of itself, but later Duchovny said he thought his son wanted to marry his mother (Oedipus anyone?). Well, Letterman’s quick reply was “Does she even like Chinese guys?” And with that, I nearly fell out of my bed. Its funny. Don’t judge me!

Anyway, that got me thinking about a story from my own enthralling childhood. I don’t know where the fascination with Chinese people comes from with suburban mutt/white kids like myself but there came a time in my life where I thought Chinese people and everything about China was hilarious. I was in third grade, and I felt so strongly about this comedic inspiration that I decided to change my name to Connie Chung. You remember her, she is married to talk show host Maury Povich and used to appear as an evening news journalist (for all I know she still does) in the 80s. So to effectuate this name change, which I was convinced would be a side splitter to all of my friends (who, it turns out had no clue who Connie Chung was, and consequently missed my comedic genius altogether) was to write her name in place of my own on all of my school papers, art projects, etc. I even refused to answer to Talia anymore, and requested, out loud in front of the class, that the teacher call me Connie Chung (just plain Connie wouldn’t have had the same effect).

After a few days I had to revert to my birth name because my teacher threatened to call home and speak to my mother about the situation if I didn’t. To this day, I revel in the advanced degree of my humor at such a young age. Oh what a joy it must have been to be my teacher. You’re welcome, Ms. Maizy!! Its, funny. DON’T JUDGE ME!